Caring for Yourself

Drink Water or Electrolytes: Labor can be physically demanding for both the birthing person and their partner. Make sure to drink water regularly to stay hydrated, and consider bringing an electrolyte drink (like coconut water or sports drinks) to replenish essential minerals.

Eat Light Snacks: Long labors can extend over many hours, so it's important to have healthy snacks on hand. Snacks like fruit, granola bars, crackers, nuts, or protein-packed snacks can provide energy without weighing you down. Check with the birthing facility about what’s allowed (some hospitals or birth centers may have restrictions on eating during labor).

Rest Between Contractions: If the birthing person is in early labor or has longer breaks between contractions, try to rest when you can. Sit down, close your eyes, or even take short walks to stretch your legs. It’s crucial not to overexert yourself, especially if the labor lasts many hours or days.

Step Outside for Fresh Air: If the birth environment feels intense or you’re feeling overwhelmed, a quick break outside for fresh air or a short walk around the hospital or birth center can help clear your mind and refresh you.

Practice Deep Breathing or Meditation: Use this time to center yourself and relax your body. Deep breathing or a short mindfulness meditation can help you stay calm and present for the birthing person.

Wear Comfortable Clothes: Dress in layers so you can adjust to the temperature in the room. Comfortable clothing, such as loose-fitting clothes or a hoodie, will help you feel more at ease and prevent you from becoming irritable or distracted by physical discomfort.

Bring Personal Comfort Items: Consider packing things that help you feel more at ease, like a cozy blanket, your favorite pillow, or a pair of comfortable slippers. Familiar items from home can make the environment feel less sterile and more supportive.

Stay Calm and Centered: It’s normal to feel anxious or overwhelmed during labor, especially if you’re watching your partner go through intense physical and emotional work. Take deep breaths, stay grounded, and remember that your calm presence is essential for your partner’s emotional well-being.

Talk It Through: If you’re feeling stressed or uncertain, it can help to talk things through with the birthing person, the doula, or the medical team. Sharing your feelings allows you to release some of the tension and better focus on your role as a support person.

Keep a Positive Mindset: If labor becomes long or difficult, try to stay positive and focus on your partner’s strength. Use positive affirmations and words of encouragement to stay upbeat, which can also help your partner stay motivated.

Stretch and Move Around: Sitting for long periods of time can leave you feeling stiff or fatigued. Take time to stretch your legs, walk around the room, or even do some gentle yoga stretches to keep your body active and energized. Moving around can also help you stay alert and maintain your stamina.

Take a Short Walk: If the birthing person is in a stage of labor where they’re resting or more focused inwardly, take a quick walk to release tension and recharge your body.

Watch the Clock for Rest Periods: Labor often has natural ebb and flow, with busier times during contractions and quieter moments in between. Keeping an eye on the clock can help you gauge when it's a good time to rest, grab a snack, or take a break without leaving your partner unsupported.

Set Reminders for Check-Ins: If you're juggling many tasks (communicating with family, managing the birthing person's comfort, etc.), set reminders for yourself to take breaks, hydrate, and check in with your own emotional state. It’s easy to forget to care for yourself when you're focused on your partner, but taking regular moments for self-care will help you stay alert and resilient.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help: If you're feeling overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to ask the doula, medical staff, or other support people for help with certain tasks. You don't have to do everything yourself—whether it’s managing visitors, keeping track of medical updates, or helping the birthing person with physical support, there’s no shame in asking for assistance.

Delegate to Trusted People: If you’ve arranged for a doula, family members, or friends to be part of your birth team, don’t hesitate to delegate small tasks to them when appropriate. This could include coordinating communication with family or running errands (like grabbing more snacks or adjusting the room temperature).

Keep Essentials Close By: Make sure that you have everything you need within arm's reach—water, snacks, phone, charger, any comfort items for both you and the birthing person. Keeping things organized will reduce stress and save time when you need to grab something quickly.

Maintain the Birth Environment: Keeping the room peaceful and calm also helps you stay in a positive state of mind. You can help manage the environment by adjusting the lighting, music, or temperature as needed to keep the atmosphere relaxing for both you and your partner.

Rest When You Can: If the labor is prolonged and you’re able to catch a nap while your partner is resting, take advantage of the opportunity. Even 20-30 minutes of sleep can help restore your energy levels, especially in the early stages of labor. You’ll need your energy to help your partner through the more intense phases.